About a month and a half ago, I flew in and out of SJC – a nice, small airport that I used to prefer, but now I do most of my flying out of SFO due to schedule flexibility and easier access. Since my departure was early in the morning, I drove to the airport since public transportation wouldn’t get me there in time. As this was also a business trip and I could expense the parking costs, I decided to use airport long-term parking instead of De La Cruz Parking, which is what I normally use when I park at SJC since it’s cheaper and they have frequent shuttles.
When I returned, I realized that in my haste to catch the parking shuttle, I had left the lights on inside my car and drained the battery. I have a AAA membership, but as I was inside the gates to the parking lot, I figured it would be difficult to get them to help me inside. I found a courtesy phone in the bus stop shelter by my car, and I decided to give airport parking a call to see if they could help me out. I told them I was by shuttle stop F and needed a jump, and they responded that they were helping someone else but would be able to help me out in about 20 minutes. Perfect!
About 20 minutes later, I saw a pickup truck with markings on the side identifying it as airport parking zoom by without slowing down, so I went back to the phone and asked if they were coming to shuttle stop F as I saw the truck go flying by without looking for me. The man on the phone told me someone was on the way and should be there shortly. I waited for another 20 minutes, then called back and asked again if they had sent anyone to shuttle stop F. They told me they couldn’t find me and they would send the guy again. Another 20 minutes pass with no sign of the truck coming back. I call again, and the conversation went something like this:
Me: Hi, I called about a jumpstart at shuttle stop F for a blue Subaru. Is that still coming?
Airport Parking: Could you pop open your hood so that the driver can find you? He said he looked around but wasn’t able to find a blue Subaru.
Me: I’m right across from shuttle stop F.
Airport Parking: We went by shuttle stop S twice.
Now when he confirmed my location the other times, it sure sounded like he said F, but this time it was distinctly an S. I knew this must have been the problem, so I decided to clarify.
Me: I’m by stop F, F as in Foxtrot.
Airport Parking: S as in Sam.
Me: No, F as in Foxtrot.
Airport Parking: Right, S as in Sam?
Now, being at an airport, I figured that the phonetic alphabet would be just about the most fail-safe option for clarifying the letter. But that obviously didn’t work, so I thought about common names that start with the letter F.
Me: No, F as in Fred.
Airport Parking: S as in Sam? Can you say another word?
You can imagine what the next work that starts with F that came to my mind was. But I decided that wouldn’t help me, so I thought very hard and came up with:
Me: F as in French fries.
Airport Parking: Ok. F as in Frank.
Me: Yes.
Airport Parking: We’ll send the guy again.
Me: Thank you.
“French fries,” which has two words that start with the letter F, worked. Within about five minutes, the pickup truck pulls up, gives me a jumpstart. I thank the guy, trying very hard not to give him a dirty look, and am finally able to leave the airport about an hour and a half after reaching my car. After all, it wasn’t his fault, it was the guy on the phone. And at any rate, the whole ordeal occurred only because I was a moron and left the lights on in my car. But it really didn’t need to be that painful.
